A new you requires a new narrative.

Let me explain. 

A new you implies that something about you has changed. 

A transformation has taken place. 

You are no longer exactly the same. 

How do we know this? 

Your actions change.

And, with enough time, others begin to notice that something about you is different. 

In order for your actions to change though, you will require a new narrative.

In order for you to take a different action in your life, you first need to rewrite the story about who you are. 

Before action, comes thought. 

And before thought, comes belief. 

Your current narrative dictates your current beliefs about who you are, and your thoughts about what is possible for you. 

A new narrative creates transformation. 

On some level we do this naturally. 

It is our birthright. 

In order to see ourselves as someone that does something that is new for us, we require the belief in a new narrative, which then propels us into actions we have likely never taken before. 

We adopt new narratives as we: 

• Move from being children to becoming adults
• Embark on a new field of studying and training
• Start a new career
• Launch our own business
• Buy our first home
• Move to a new city or country 
• Become parents 
• Stop drinking alcohol
• Lose weight
• Quit smoking
• Embrace a new routine 

Have you ever thought any of the following things to yourself?

It’s hard.

I feel so tired.

It’s impossible to do it with my son or daughter.

More sleep is what I need, not less.

It’s not for me. 

I don’t enjoy it. 

The market will only pay so much.

It’s the economy. 

How am I supposed to do this? 

No one in my family has ever achieved that. 

People will laugh at me. 

What if I fail? 

Nothing ever changes. 

That person is so lucky. 

It’s not easy. 

The older we get, the more unconscious we often become about our current narratives. 

We feel convinced that things are the way that they are. 

So we stay in the comfort zone of the narratives that we know. 

We stay safe. 

And we keep repeating the same patterns wondering why this is our fate. 

I had never traveled alone before. 

In fact, I had never even sat down by myself at a restaurant on a friday or saturday night to have dinner at a table, by myself. 

When I bought a one way plane ticket to Greece in May 2021, I was operating in a new narrative. 

This new narrative said that at 38 years old, I could travel alone and I would travel alone for the first time ever. 

This new version of Marissa (with a new narrative) had different beliefs and thoughts, and as a result took actions that would have previously been thought of as impossible. 

In order to take this sort of action for the first time in my life, a new narrative was needed. 

And, in order to adopt this new narrative, I had to work on letting go of my old ones. 

In order for someone to take a new action, they must shift their thoughts about what is possible in their life. 

In order to shift your thoughts, you must believe and know…..

A new possibility

A new paradigm

And see your Self as someone with the ability to act differently than you have before. 

Some of us repeat the same patterns over and over again. 

The same experience occurs. 

Is it a coincidence? Of course not. 

It’s a narrative. 

And, for a lot of us, our current narratives are not even something we are consciously aware of. 

We experience the result of the narrative we are living in…..

and yet we do not understand that it is a narrative or story in our minds that is keeping us living the life we currently have. 

Relationships

Love

Time

Money 

Work

Family

Body

Family

Friendships

For you to transform any area of your life, you must adopt a new narrative and make it yours. 

How does one do this? 

It starts with some self reflection and by asking ourselves some questions. 

For me, one of the most powerful paths one can take toward a new narrative requires neutralizing our thoughts.

When you are no longer worried about the worst case scenario…..

When you have sat with it and observed it…….

When you have decided that it no longer scares you, 

then nothing can stop you from creating a new narrative. 

The beauty of our lives is that we have the opportunity to create an unlimited amount of new narratives. 

We can design our lives and re-design our lives constantly. 

Nothing says we have to remain as we have been. 

We do, though, need to create a new narrative that allows us to transition into this new space and role in our life. 

Here is what has worked for me:

STEP 1: What area of your life do you want to transform?

Is it money?

Your love life?

Your career?

Having greater freedom?

Your family dynamics? 

Closer friends and relationships?

A new work environment or job? 

The success of your business? 

I knew that my love life was a problem. And, that I had to shift something in ME. 

What is it for you? 

STEP 2: Identify what holds you back

What concerns you about the area of your life that you want to transform?

Bad track record? 

Inability to make changes?

Fear of the unknown? 

Rejection? 

Failure? 

Loss? 

What will people think of you? 

I was concerned about my love life and yet what was really running behind this was a deep seeded thought about the possibility of ending up alone. This thought had a narrative and that narrative kept leading me into relationships where I always ended up feeling alone. None of the relationships worked. 

And, I was alone. 

It took me a very long time before I was able to see that the real issue was not my love life. The real issue was a fear about ending up alone. 

My desire to have a relationship was a way to escape what actually worried me. 

Whatever area of your life you want to transform, you must first figure out what is in fact holding you back from being able to achieve the thing you desire. 

For example, if you want to earn more money ask yourself if you worry about having no money.

It might sound logical to worry about having no money. 

That narrative though will impact the choices you make. 

STEP 3: Face your thoughts. 

The way I learned to neutralize my thoughts was by sitting with it. 

Let’s pretend the worst case scenario happened to you. 

Would you still wake up the next morning? 

Would life continue as it always does? 

Would you have more opportunities to try again? 

I spent months visualizing my worst case scenario. every single day. 

The question I asked myself was: if my worst case scenario occurred, could I still envision a life for myself that was greater than my current condition? 

Could I have more love? 

More joy? 

More happiness? 

More peace? 

For six months, I sat with the idea of living a life where I was alone.

I did not marry, I had no boyfriend, and I never had children. 

I was, however, happier than ever before, more fulfilled, more enlivened, and experienced greater levels of peace, joy, and purpose. 

At first it was not easy to imagine a life where I was alone and yet happier than ever. This seemed impossible. 

The more that I sat with the visualizations and journaled on the possibilities, the more familiar it began to feel. 

What I realized was that in this new possibility, I was dedicating myself to growing and expanding my Self. 

Travel was a big component.

Meeting new people, being exposed to new cultures. 

The more I sat with my fear, the more at ease I felt within myself. 

This ultimately led to buying a one way ticket to Greece. 

A country that I had once associated with love and relationships. 

Going alone to Greece would be the perfect opportunity to experience in real life how it would feel to be alone. 

Whatever you want to transform: 

• Identify what holds your back
• Sit with the worst case scenario and visualize it
• Do not run away when it gets uncomfortable
• Stay with it until you neutralize it 

STEP 4: Take the inspired action based on your new narrative

Once you sit with your worst case scenario and neutralize it, an opportunity will present itself for you to truly live out a new narrative. 

Will it feel scary and foreign? YES. 

Take it! 

And here is the important part, ACT as the version of you that no longer has that old fear and narrative. 

In my case, I bought a one way ticket to Greece in order to BE someone who was perfectly happy being alone. I did this after six months focusing on the possibility of a life where I was by myself and happy. 

I figured I would last around 10 days. 

I stayed 101 days. 

Throughout the experience, it was a daily and constant reminder to myself to BE the version of myself that no longer had issues being alone. 

What happened was remarkable. I was never really alone. I felt more supported, secure, and happy than I had ever been before. 

And, it prompted a life altering change in my life. 

When the opportunity comes (and it will) for you to live out your new narrative, take it. 

Remind yourself that you already know the worst case scenario and you know that you are able to overcome it. 

You desire to experience life within this new narrative. 

And prepare yourself for your life to radically transform in ways you could never have imagined or predicted. 

STEP 5: Stay Consistent! 

Re-writing narratives requires consistent discipline and a willingness to observe yourself. 

Old thoughts and beliefs creep in. 

They never fully go away. 

The difference now is that you are aware of them, and you choose to take new inspired action either way. 

And, you will wake up one day and your life will be altered as a result of this process. 

STEP 6: Start over from Step 1 

Once you start living your new narrative, watch as you begin to observe other areas of your life that you now also want to transform. 

I no longer worry about being alone. That narrative has been altered and I live from a new one today. 

As a result, I have recently begun to examine my narrative around money. And, I am going back through this whole process to re-write my narrative and alter the beliefs and thoughts that I have with money. 

The truth is that we do have the ability to transform and alter any and all areas of our lives. 

To do that, we simply require new narratives about who we are, and as a result of that, we make choices that reaffirm the beliefs and thoughts we carry about what is possible. 

Give this a try. 

Be patient. 

You’ve lived up until now with a certain narrative and it will take time and practice to bring new ones into your life. 

The good news is that just like anything else… the more you practice this, the more efficient you become in this process. 

With love,

Marissa